Back on Track, Jack.

Oh hello.

Sorry it's been a while.

Life got a little crazy.

My besty from college moved, then I had finals, then I had to clean and move out and say goodbye to my beloved Provo.

But now I'm finally home and I can focus more on mission stuff since school is fiNaLlY oVeR 

(yeah baby!)

I went for a three mile run (first time ever) with my mom this morning.

Now I'm laying in my bed (aka mattress on the floor in the middle of my mom's sewing room) and I want to die because my legs are so sore.

I should probably go clean the bathroom though, because now I have to share with my brother and I'm sure you can guess what it looks like..... why are boys so gross?!
(there are jars of baby food everywhere because he insists that his pet lizard deserves only the best... mango mush, yum!)

This song has been stuck on repeat in my head for that past month. We sang it in my choir in high school, and I loved it. Good reminder, especially when life gets hard.

Happy Mondee!

~Manda

For-e-ver.

Today, I got to go be with some of my familia as my aunt finished her

LAST chemo treatment (holla!).

I have a big family, and I think they're pretty awesome.

We're soooo not perfect, but I know they would do anything for me, 

and I would do anything for them and that's really what matters.

It's kind of scary to leave my family behind while I go serve the Lord for 18 months. It's so much harder than I thought it would be!

And the truth is, the hardest part isn't even over. There are battles in the future that my family is going to have to fight that will probably be pretty hard.

Big confession here..... it TERRIFIES me that I will be gone for that.

So I was just thinking about these things while at the hospital today,
and then this happened:

My aunt's kids all ran up to the window outside of the hospital holding posters and signs cheering on their momma. All of the other cancer patients in the room, along with their family members and the nurses, started crying and taking pictures of us. Of my family. It made me stop and think. Why were they so impacted by this?

In that moment I realized how truly blessed I am.

Yes my family may be going through something hard right now, but we are still full of faith and love and hope because we know what's up. And that faith and love and hope shows in our actions as a testimony to those around us of the things that we know.

We know that God is watching over us and has a plan. We trust in that plan.

We have the knowledge that, because of the temple and its sealing power, 

we will get to be together

forever.

And forever is a pretty dang long time.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

{sorry, i couldn't resist......}

100 Things, part one

Today marks 100 days before I leave on my mission!

What the what.

I've been thinking about my life.

It's been given to me, and what am I doing to make the most of it?

When my life is over, I want to say I LIVED.

In honor of this momentous occasion, I'm making a list of 

100 Things I WILL do with my Life:
(if you don't want to read it all, I understand)

{PART ONE}

1. Trust in God with all my heart, and don't lean on my own understanding.
(Proverbs 3:5-6)

2. Serve a full-time mission, with no regrets.

3. Serve another full-time mission with my hubby,
when we are old and cute and more in love than ever.

4. Make the temple an integral part of my life.
Don't let a month go by without going there.

5.  Learn how to make new recipes without ruining them.

6. Always sing to my children.

7. Be a woman of charity.

8. Cheerfully do all things that lie in my power, then stand still, with the utmost assurance, and see the hand of the Lord revealed in my life. (D&C 123:17)

9. Be "ever found doing the work of the Lord."
(President Monson quote)

10. Avoid immorality in all its forms (music, books, movies, internet, etc.).

11. Be a woman of virtue.

12. Never pray to change my circumstances, but pray to be able to
cheerfully go through whatever the Lord asks of me.

 13. Pay a full-tithe.

14. Be a modern pioneer, living with the fire of the covenant burning in my heart.

15. Be a woman of gratitude.

 16. Let the atonement work in my life.
Not only it's ability to cleanse from sin, but it's ability to enable me.

17. Doubt not, fear not. In all things look to the Lord.
(D&C 6:36)

18. Live my testimony.

19. Be not overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.
(Romans 12:21)

20. Be a woman of silent strength.

21. Raise a family in a gospel-centered home, teaching my children not just gospel truths, but how to receive a testimony of those truths for themselves.

22. Always make my first priority following my Savior.

23. Live so others know Christ through me.

24. When the Lord commands, do it.

25. Learn to love veggies (like beets and zucchini....)

26. Travel to Scotland and run down the luscious, green hills on a rainy day.

27. Travel to Africa. And deliver African babies.

28. Serve amongst another culture. Love them.

29. Get my Nursing degree from BYU and use it to bless lives
all around the world.

30. Shake the hand of an apostle,
and maybe even say something to him (without being awkward)

31. Fall in love with my best friend.

32. Remember who is fighting my battles (the Lord, aka, my BFF).
(Exodus 14:13-14)

33. Learn to love Chinese food. But never seafood. Ever.

34. Stand in holy places. Always.

35. Play the piano all the days.

36. Have my hubby sing "Never Stop" by Safetysuit to me.
Without me telling him to do it.

37. And "Endlessly" by Green Green River Ordinance.

38. And "You are my Sunshine"

39. Basically just get a hubby who will sing to me.

40. Be honest in what I do and in what I know.

41. Create a family manifesto (when I get a familia of my own).

42. Dance in the rain. Always.

43. Be true to who I am (a daughter of the Most High God).

44. Never let the world tell me how I should think, act, or look.

45. Remember that it is by the "small and simple things that great things are brought to pass." (Alma 37:6)

46. Love the unlovable.

47. See others as God sees them, not as the world sees them.

48. Read the Book of Mormon EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
Even it's just a verse. It has power that I need daily.

49. Go on the field before a BYU football game and meet a football player.

50. Give birth to a future BYU football player.

PART 2 COMING SOON!

My Choice

This is a little bit more of a serious post, but there's a lot that's been on this little mind of mine.

You know how it goes.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about truth and faith.

I get frustrated, sometimes, because there are so many ideas and philosophies and viewpoints being thrown around in the world right now, and some days I feel a lot of 

pressure to reconsider the things I believe.

The dark, bold line between right and wrong is becoming not so dark and bold anymore.

And with all the different opinions in the world, it can be really easy to question.

Questioning isn't bad, but it can be, if it starts to overcome your faith.

I have come to learn the following three truths for myself:

1. Having faith and trust in God is a choice.

2. God's laws and commandments are pure truth, they have never changed, 

and they will never change.

3. The prophet and his apostles speak for God.

Honestly, having faith doesn't mean you have all the answers.

It doesn't mean that life is easy, that you wake up perfectly happy every morning, with the sun shining and everything going exactly as you planned. My life sure isn't that way.

But it does mean that you hope and yearn for something more. Something deep inside you believes that you weren't sent here to Earth to fail or be miserable or take up space, but to grow, and learn, and succeed. To love, be loved, serve, and feel joy, pain, and sadness, all for some greater purpose.

I definitely don't understand or know a lot of things, 

but I do know the things that, in my opinion, are the most important.

I know that I am a daughter of the Most High God, the person who created worlds without end, and I have a purpose. I know that my Heavenly Father is kind and loving, I can have a personal relationship with Him, and He is aware of me and has a plan for my life that will bring me more joy than my own plans will. He will help me achieve the potential I have as His daughter.

I know this because I have chosen to seek Him throughout my life through listening to his prophets, studying the scriptures, and speaking with Him in prayer. 

Has it been easy? Definitely not! There have been times when I have wanted to give up, when I have had doubts, felt alone, and been afraid. At times I have felt this way for weeks and even months, and sometimes only for a short time. I have days like this all the time, it's nothin new.

But- there have also been times when I have felt His quiet, yet strong, influence in my life. Times when He has answered the pleadings of my heart in ways that are so specific and personal to me that they could not be a coincidence. 

There have also been times when He has not answered the pleadings of my heart, but then He led me to something better, because He had greater things in store for me.

I also know that the prophet, President Thomas S. Monson, speaks for God. That the things he says are the things God himself wants the world to hear. That no matter what anyone might say, it doesn’t change the truthfulness of the words of the prophet.

I know this, because I have been in the presence of the prophet as he has been teaching the words of God, and I have felt in indescribable yet undeniable ways that what he speaks is truth. As I have chosen to do my best to pattern my life after his teachings, I have found great peace and happiness in my life, which testifies to me that what he teaches is true and good.

Because I have come to know these things for myself and I choose to have faith in them, all of the the things I don't know can fall away.

Because I know these things, nothing, NOTHING, anyone can
do or say to me will persuade me otherwise.

Life isn't easy, but my life feels complete, because I know who I am and in whom I trust.

I find so much peace and joy in believing these things!

I want the world to know that this is what I believe, 

and I choose to believe it with all my heart.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

To hear the prophet and his fellow apostles speak live, watch the 184th General Conference for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (which is seriously one of my most favorite things ever) this Saturday and Sunday here.